Wednesday, July 30, 2003
it has dawned upon me that maybe it is not worth my time typing banal stuff about myself, just for a taste of cyber-immortality. i have decided to hold a poll.
if anybody is reading this, at all, i would like you to email me. put the word "blog" somewhere in the title, or i probably won't see it, and delete it. if i recieve an email before the middle of august, maybe i'll carry on.
or maybe i won't.
its up to you, i guess.
your beloved writer,
jamie jones,
mojojojo0@hotmail.com or
tarquin_delouche@hotmail.com
if anybody is reading this, at all, i would like you to email me. put the word "blog" somewhere in the title, or i probably won't see it, and delete it. if i recieve an email before the middle of august, maybe i'll carry on.
or maybe i won't.
its up to you, i guess.
your beloved writer,
jamie jones,
mojojojo0@hotmail.com or
tarquin_delouche@hotmail.com
Friday, July 11, 2003
so, now i find myself stuck in a situation that makes me sad. i'm here, and i can't get out for a while. and no amount of crying will change that. i guess you would understand.
its amazing how slow time passes when you're trying to hold on.
I PLEDGE ALIEGENCE TO THE FLAG OF THE GREATEST AND MOST FREE COUNTRY IN THE WORLD AND TO THE REPUBLIC FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION, UNDER THE ONE TRUE GOD, MY GOD, WHATEVER THE COST, WITH LIBERTY AND "JUSTICE" FOR ALL WHO DO AS I SAY.
its amazing how slow time passes when you're trying to hold on.
I PLEDGE ALIEGENCE TO THE FLAG OF THE GREATEST AND MOST FREE COUNTRY IN THE WORLD AND TO THE REPUBLIC FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION, UNDER THE ONE TRUE GOD, MY GOD, WHATEVER THE COST, WITH LIBERTY AND "JUSTICE" FOR ALL WHO DO AS I SAY.
Thursday, July 10, 2003
so, anyway, i've been thinking. i've never had a benefactor before. how do you act towards one? do you have to call him "sir"? do i have to name my first child after him?
YOU LOVE ME, DON'T YOU? SAY IT! SAY IT!! I WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY IT!!! SAY IT OR ITS CURTAINS FOR YOU.
YOU LOVE ME, DON'T YOU? SAY IT! SAY IT!! I WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY IT!!! SAY IT OR ITS CURTAINS FOR YOU.
Wednesday, July 09, 2003
it is now the third day of my new life in the blogging world, and i have come to realise that my life is not exciting enough to keep an online journal. i have also thought about the fact that if someones life IS so exciting that a blog must be kept up to date, then they would have no time to sit typing about it every day.
i have decided that i need a gadget. i want a cool little thing i can take out of my pocket and play with every now and again. something like a PDA with some extra little essential things that every boy needs. like a game of top trumps that you can play with your friends hundreds of miles away, or a tree mapping system that automatically calculates the fastest, or most challenging way to climb a tree. all you do is point a camera at it, and it takes a picture, and does the rest itself. (somewhere in there, theres a "root-mapping system" joke, but maybe thats too obvious).
did i mention that i'm 26?
i'm starting to get worried about my friend tom he's never had so many violent tendencies before. maybe he's playing too many computer games.
NEEDED: A TRAINING COURSE IN PICKING LOCKS, BREAKING SAFES, AND SMUGGLING JEWELS ACROSS BORDERS.
i have decided that i need a gadget. i want a cool little thing i can take out of my pocket and play with every now and again. something like a PDA with some extra little essential things that every boy needs. like a game of top trumps that you can play with your friends hundreds of miles away, or a tree mapping system that automatically calculates the fastest, or most challenging way to climb a tree. all you do is point a camera at it, and it takes a picture, and does the rest itself. (somewhere in there, theres a "root-mapping system" joke, but maybe thats too obvious).
did i mention that i'm 26?
i'm starting to get worried about my friend tom he's never had so many violent tendencies before. maybe he's playing too many computer games.
NEEDED: A TRAINING COURSE IN PICKING LOCKS, BREAKING SAFES, AND SMUGGLING JEWELS ACROSS BORDERS.
Tuesday, July 08, 2003
so today is the second day of my blogging life.
having slept on the idea of revealing myself to the world, i awoke with a slight thirst.
i quickly solved this problem with a drink of water, and found that i didn't feel any different about myself, or any more uncomfortable with the world.
so today, i thought i would explain what i'm doing in norway. or i will try to explain, then get sidetracked, and talk about something else entirely.
i came here originally to earn some money. working in a hotel near lillehammer, i am supposedly funding my future travels around europe. so far, in the seven months i have been here, i have managed to save almost nothing whatsoever.
an acheivement that neither shames or surprises me.
secondly, while i am here, i thought i would maybe write a book. this is another of those good intentions that have so far gone unfullfilled. (a quick note about my life of good intentions...i have never followed through on any of my good intentions. similarly, none of my good things have been done intentionally. one day i intend to compile a list of all my good intentions.)
i was hoping to be here for one year, to fully experience the country. then as i realised just what norway could offer me, i decided that six months would be sufficient. so, now i'm doing everything i can to leave. i am just about to take a course telling me how to teach english in foreign countries. so soon, i will be a fully qualified teacher. (i have been "just about to do" stuff for years. just like the graphic design course i was "just about to take" two years ago, and the book i was "just about to write" six months ago. my biggest problem is that i have the shortest attention span you could ever imagine. take my friend, ricardo, he's spanish. and then
whats on my c.d. player today...radiohead-"hail to the thief"
having slept on the idea of revealing myself to the world, i awoke with a slight thirst.
i quickly solved this problem with a drink of water, and found that i didn't feel any different about myself, or any more uncomfortable with the world.
so today, i thought i would explain what i'm doing in norway. or i will try to explain, then get sidetracked, and talk about something else entirely.
i came here originally to earn some money. working in a hotel near lillehammer, i am supposedly funding my future travels around europe. so far, in the seven months i have been here, i have managed to save almost nothing whatsoever.
an acheivement that neither shames or surprises me.
secondly, while i am here, i thought i would maybe write a book. this is another of those good intentions that have so far gone unfullfilled. (a quick note about my life of good intentions...i have never followed through on any of my good intentions. similarly, none of my good things have been done intentionally. one day i intend to compile a list of all my good intentions.)
i was hoping to be here for one year, to fully experience the country. then as i realised just what norway could offer me, i decided that six months would be sufficient. so, now i'm doing everything i can to leave. i am just about to take a course telling me how to teach english in foreign countries. so soon, i will be a fully qualified teacher. (i have been "just about to do" stuff for years. just like the graphic design course i was "just about to take" two years ago, and the book i was "just about to write" six months ago. my biggest problem is that i have the shortest attention span you could ever imagine. take my friend, ricardo, he's spanish. and then
whats on my c.d. player today...radiohead-"hail to the thief"
Monday, July 07, 2003
first, let me explain, that i'm not a real monkey.
that would be fantastic, but alas, i cannot be a monkey, i evolved beyond that stage when i was young, and i cannot go back.
as i write this, i struggle to find inspiration, as the rain beats on my window, breaking my concentration, and the clouds obscure the norwegian landscape outside.
let me introduce myself.
i am a 26 year old english boy, in norway. lost in norway, searching hard for a way out, formulating a plan to beat all other plans. i came here looking for a highway, but found only a cul-de-sac.
i am supposed to be travelling around europe, but somehow, i ended up coming here six months ago. (didn't know at the time that norway is not part of the european union.) as with all bad ideas, it seemed to be a good one at the time.
i left my home and friends in england at the end of 2002, having spent christmas with the best of my friends. because of this, i realised just how much i loved him, something that, being boys, we never really expressed to each other unless under the influence of alcohol, cigarettes, rock n roll, or all of the above. (read his life by clicking on this bit here and gag at the similarities between us).
saying goodbye to him was the first and last time i had any doubts over whether or not i was doing the right thing.
as soon as i entered the arrivals lounge at copenhagen airport, i knew that not only was it the greatest adventure i had ever had, but also the best thing i would ever do.
the original idea was for me to travel the world, taking with me only the essentials: my clothes, my guitar, and my journal. it was my aim to get into as many situations and escapades as possible (note: situations and escapades not limited by laws and local customs), and keep up to date with my journal, so that in my future, i would sit around the fireplace and tell all my tales of adventure to my wide-eyed grandchildren.
however, i sit here in july, with a journal that runs current up to march, a great set of photographs, and a wide selection of unrealised good intentions.
its time for action.
so here i am, taking the only action i know how...sitting in front of the computer on the internet.
i was thinking that maybe the best way of catching up with what i have done since i left england is a simple list. everyone loves reading lists. if you were to compile a list of the worlds favourite activities, listing would come a close second to reading lists.
so, the "cool things i have done since leaving england" list:
1. i have travelled into the arctic circle, taken a pee-pee there, then came back. very refreshing.
2. i have seen the northern lights, and the midnight sun.
3. i have got myself a genuine italian girlfriend. just one.
4. i have written and starred in a play.
5. i have been drunk in copenhagen central square on new years eve.
6. i have been to the opening night of an opera in italy with lots of important people.
7. i have learned how to say "underwear" in ten different languages.
for now, thats all i can remember.
but thats seven different cool things, in six months. at a rate of one cool thing a month, i calculate that in five years time, i will have all the stories i need to keep the grandchildren entertained.
that would be fantastic, but alas, i cannot be a monkey, i evolved beyond that stage when i was young, and i cannot go back.
as i write this, i struggle to find inspiration, as the rain beats on my window, breaking my concentration, and the clouds obscure the norwegian landscape outside.
let me introduce myself.
i am a 26 year old english boy, in norway. lost in norway, searching hard for a way out, formulating a plan to beat all other plans. i came here looking for a highway, but found only a cul-de-sac.
i am supposed to be travelling around europe, but somehow, i ended up coming here six months ago. (didn't know at the time that norway is not part of the european union.) as with all bad ideas, it seemed to be a good one at the time.
i left my home and friends in england at the end of 2002, having spent christmas with the best of my friends. because of this, i realised just how much i loved him, something that, being boys, we never really expressed to each other unless under the influence of alcohol, cigarettes, rock n roll, or all of the above. (read his life by clicking on this bit here and gag at the similarities between us).
saying goodbye to him was the first and last time i had any doubts over whether or not i was doing the right thing.
as soon as i entered the arrivals lounge at copenhagen airport, i knew that not only was it the greatest adventure i had ever had, but also the best thing i would ever do.
the original idea was for me to travel the world, taking with me only the essentials: my clothes, my guitar, and my journal. it was my aim to get into as many situations and escapades as possible (note: situations and escapades not limited by laws and local customs), and keep up to date with my journal, so that in my future, i would sit around the fireplace and tell all my tales of adventure to my wide-eyed grandchildren.
however, i sit here in july, with a journal that runs current up to march, a great set of photographs, and a wide selection of unrealised good intentions.
its time for action.
so here i am, taking the only action i know how...sitting in front of the computer on the internet.
i was thinking that maybe the best way of catching up with what i have done since i left england is a simple list. everyone loves reading lists. if you were to compile a list of the worlds favourite activities, listing would come a close second to reading lists.
so, the "cool things i have done since leaving england" list:
1. i have travelled into the arctic circle, taken a pee-pee there, then came back. very refreshing.
2. i have seen the northern lights, and the midnight sun.
3. i have got myself a genuine italian girlfriend. just one.
4. i have written and starred in a play.
5. i have been drunk in copenhagen central square on new years eve.
6. i have been to the opening night of an opera in italy with lots of important people.
7. i have learned how to say "underwear" in ten different languages.
for now, thats all i can remember.
but thats seven different cool things, in six months. at a rate of one cool thing a month, i calculate that in five years time, i will have all the stories i need to keep the grandchildren entertained.
